We’re all about festive cheer, but Thanksgiving is getting squeezed out by spooky cobwebs and nativity scenes. It’s time to chuck the stale candy corn, untangle the tinsel, and finally give Thanksgiving leftovers the origin story they deserve.
“I haven’t even finished eating all my Halloween candy,” groans Sally Brown in “A Charlie Brown Thanksgiving.” Shoutout to anyone whose jack-o’-lantern hasn’t shriveled up before it’s beginning to look a lot like Christmas.
I’m done doing Thanksgiving dirty. Just like sibling hierarchy where the firstborn establishes the pace and the baby gets all the attention, Thanksgiving toils amid forgotten middle child syndrome. Back in 1942, America carved out this sacred fourth Thursday in November to count our blessings and later bask in the glow of the televised Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade. It was a clear day of intentional gratitude just before we knocked down the door for 75-inch TV Black Friday deals. “God bless us, every one!” said Tiny Tim in “A Christmas Carol,” adding “Grand Theft Auto VI” to his cart with his little crutch.
Maybe late-night host Johnny Carson best described the most enduring trope about turkey day when he joked, “Thanksgiving is an emotional holiday. People travel thousands of miles to be with people they only see once a year. And then discover once a year is way too much.”
Family dynamics aside, another major player is the holiday creep. I have foggy elementary school memories of days spent pretending to be Pilgrims and Indigenous tribes coming together over a shared love of corn and rewriting history with cafeteria-grade pumpkin squares. But with the Christmas shop-pocalypse now officially launching in mid-November at Disney parks, the Mall of America, and the “seasonal” aisle of my local drugstore, Thanksgiving feels more like an annoying bump in the road as we rush into the most wonderful retail time of the year. (Don’t feel guilty about your spending spree. That’s what Giving Tuesday is for.)
In case you missed it, Mariah Carey’s annual “defrosting” to launch the Christmas season at midnight on November 1 featured a Halloween intro that led straight into her signature hot Mrs. Claus holiday look. A follow-up Gucci campaign then turned Mariah’s “All I Want for Christmas Is You” into the official soundtrack of luxury gifting. Why do we care? Because zero turkeys were harmed in the making of this content. Dear everyone but PETA, it’s a problem when Thanksgiving’s being cut out of the culture.
Then there’s the retail component. Even though cranflated turkey and sides now cost the average American family $90 (add a little more for travel), that’s small scalloped potatoes compared to the $13.5 billion we threw down on Halloween and the record-shattering $1 trillion we’ll be shelling out for Christmas. Turns out there’s not much money in appreciating the gifts we already have.
It might not look like it at first, but Halloween and Christmas actually have a lot in common. They both feature costumes (looking at you, ugly Christmas sweaters), wall-to-wall decor, and rich traditions. What’s Thanksgiving got going for it? Batten down your gravy boats as we pardon just two of the 46 million turkeys we’ll eat. There’s also football and cornucopias.
For the record, I’m down with all three major holidays giving us something to look forward to during the last 55 days of the year. I love the apple cider, crisp leaves, and creative costume energy of harvest season almost as much as the warm-hearted generosity and Hallmark movie vibe of Jesus’ birthday month. But Thanksgiving offers us all something different: a moment to reflect.
American painter Norman Rockwell’s iconic Thanksgiving family portrait set a high bar for the idyllic family meal with its crowd of smiling faces around the table. This painting, “Freedom from Want,” was actually inspired by Franklin D. Roosevelt’s 1941 State of the Union. Along with preserving freedom of speech, faith, and a sense of security, FDR described our American right to “Freedom from want — which, translated into world terms, means economic understandings which will secure to every nation a healthy peacetime life for its inhabitants.” Having enough to put food on the table for the people you love sounds pretty Thanksgiving-y, right? No wonder he’s the guy who signed the holiday’s current date into law.
Speaking of food, most of us can probably agree that Thanksgiving would be nothing without its pièce de résistance. Whether it’s Friendsgiving, a family potluck, or your first time deep-frying the bird, blessedly, perfection lies in customizable comfort.
I’ve never been a gravy fan. And, honestly, I’m open to exploring other meats. But my boyfriend, who was born and raised in Puerto Rico, is a purist when it comes to what makes the meal that happens once a year. Must-haves: roasted turkey, sweet potato casserole, cranberry sauce, gravy and biscuits, green bean casserole with bacon, mashed potatoes and gravy, stuffing, and pumpkin pie.
When we visited the home of a wonderful Thai restaurateur one Thanksgiving in Los Angeles, our host treated us to a gorgeous lemongrass fish stew, mango salad, and spicy basil fried rice. As we got in the car to drive home, my boyfriend announced, “We have to make everything tomorrow.”
I looked at him like he was Peppermint Patty in “A Charlie Brown Thanksgiving” calling Snoopy out for his cooking. “What’s this? A piece of toast? A pretzel stick? Popcorn? … What kind of a Thanksgiving dinner is this?” We were so grateful for the incredible meal prepared by our dear friend. And the beauty of a discount two-buck pie the day after.
Even if the turkey turns out as dry as the one in “National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation,” or the side dishes taste like Rachel’s sweet and savory trifle from “Friends,” this hot mess meal is your mess. And what a beautiful thing to be able to share it with each other. As Lorelai told Rory on “Gilmore Girls,” “It’s not too much food. This is what we’ve been training for our whole lives. This is our destiny. This is our finest hour.”
If we can save room for a second piece of pie, maybe we can carve out a space for America’s most gratitude-filled holiday. Let Adam Sandler’s “Thanksgiving Song” play you out.
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