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Iranian Generals Kicking Themselves For Not Just Meeting Over Zoom

iranian-generals-kicking-themselves-for-not-just-meeting-over-zoom
Iranian Generals Kicking Themselves For Not Just Meeting Over Zoom

TEHRAN — Iranian military leaders are reportedly “really kicking themselves” for not just having their latest meeting over zoom.

In hindsight, the Iranian generals who were still alive felt that perhaps gathering all of the military’s leaders together in one physical location was a mistake.

“We may have made a bit of a boo-boo,” said newly promoted Iranian general Heydar Rahimi. “You know, looking in retrospect, I can now see that maybe gathering all the top generals into one building was not that smart. They could have so easily just met on Zoom. But, the generals’ pagers said to go, so they went.”

Surveying the wreckage of the former military headquarters, Rahimi could not help but feel that their chronic annoyance with Zoom meetings had got the better of them. “No one likes Zoom meetings, but face-to-face meetings have their downsides – like everyone dying at once,” said Rahimi. “It’s annoying when the sound cuts in and out, or when some idiot changes his background. Still, it’s not as annoying as our entire chain of command exploding in a massive fireball.”

At publishing time, Rahimi had thought perhaps it was unwise to also have brought the Ayatollah to their get-together.


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