BREA, CA — Church members were reportedly aghast when, during a routine worship service, the worship leader brought an accordion onto the stage.
Worship Leader Brent Filet reportedly took center stage during the singing of “Amazing Grace” with accordion in hand, ready to rock its squeezebox.
“Why is he doing that? Who told him he could do that?” asked longtime church member Dylan McCoy. “SACRILEGE!”
Members of the youth section were reportedly unsure of what the strange instrument was, but instinctively understood it as Satanic. Zachary Smith, 13, said, “Instant -1000 aura for those skibidi Ohio vibes, chat. Real unc energy here, bruh.” Melissa Doutraug echoed this sentiment, noting, “Gyatt.”
According to sources, the church service was not salvageable following the worship leader’s major faux pas. Filet recognized his error and quickly placed the accordion out of sight, but the damage had already been done. The youth were straight-up mogged by the accordion bellows shake, while older members of the congregation couldn’t help but think fondly of Weird Al Yankovic.
“Weird Al is a great man, but he’s not Christ,” said one deacon. “I’m ashamed that I was forced to think about him during church.”
At publishing time, Brent Filet had been dismissed from his duties as worship leader and forced to spend the rest of his life seeking a more acceptable venue where he could play his accordion.
Do you think you can guess which one is the terrorist?
