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Subway Names Diddy As New Spokesman

U.S. — The Subway sandwich franchise has excitedly announced its newest spokesman, Sean “Diddy” Combs.

With the two sides in talks over the past year, Subway stated that the discovery portions of Combs’ trial showed that he was exactly what the company was looking for in a spokesman.

“The verdict is in: these footlongs are delicious,” said Combs in his latest commercial spot. “Mm-mmm. These ingredients are so fresh, you know they weren’t trafficked across state lines. I sure do love these meatballs. And don’t forget to order it ‘Diddy Style’, with extra oil!”

Subway will launch the new partnership with a “Freak Week” where each of Diddy’s favorite sandwiches will be on sale. “Just slide on in for a great deal,” said Subway CEO John Chidsey. “Come see what all the screaming is about, starting this Monday at your local Subway. Don’t let this deal slip away!”

At publishing time, Diddy had also been selected as the new host for a re-launch of Blue’s Clues.


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