Hello wives, did you find a spider in your home? Do you know whether it’s poisonous and deadly?
Read on to find out about all the different types of spiders and when you should worry:
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The Black Widow spider. They are very dangerous. You must make every effort to avoid and eradicate.
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This is probably another Black Widow. Stay clear.
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A Black Widow spider. You can tell by the markings
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Another dangerous Black Widow.
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Again, this is a Black Widow. This could kill you instantly in one bite.
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Yep, another Black Widow.
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Black Widow spider again. Stay away!
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Definitely a Black Widow.
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This is another Black Widow spider. Kill it with fire if you want to survive.
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This last example is a Black Widow. Nuke it from orbit. It’s the only way to be sure.
Well, there you have it, wives: The definitive guide to spiders from the experts at The Babylon Bee. Now you know that you are dealing with a Black Widow spider and you must burn the entire house down if you see one to protect your loved ones.
The Founding Fathers didn’t always agree behind closed doors.