TUCSON, AZ — Local father Mark Howell told his son this week that he couldn’t come play catch with him because someone was saying something dumb online that needed immediate attention.
Asked by his son, Jack, to go out and throw the ball around, Howell responded that he was going to be busy for a while completely owning this poor loser on the Internet.
“Sorry, buddy, not today,” Howell said. “This guy says the Second Amendment only applied to the military and you’ve got to believe I have a lot to say to him. Maybe next week.”
Sources said Jack Howell could be seen walking away with his head down while his dad typed furiously on his phone, muttering something about “shall not be infringed.”
“I love my dad, and I really want to play catch with him,” Jack said. “But I know he has very important work to do online. He told me last week he couldn’t go fly a kite because his 604 followers needed to know what he thought about government-run grocery stores in New York City.”
Howell said he plans on interacting with his son just as soon as he proves a few more commies wrong online.
At publishing time, Howell had declared victory in his online argument after a mere seven hours of continuous posting.
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